Don't play with it

So I've been sick the past couple days and I've been deliberating on my posts. In fact I have a few half-typed posts that I shall officialize in due time.

Now onto greater matters...

I've heard time and time again people of both genders, but more so male, state that 'every time they get into a relationship suddenly the world of women become aware of their existence and attempt to pursue a relationship.' This has never been the case with me. I've never met a guy and thought to myself 'HEYYY... you have a girlfriend? Ok, I'm going to try harder to get with you.' *big bright perky smile*

No. Just no. This is not the Olympics. We're not trying harder to break any records. Why the hell would I want to pursue someone who has already found someone else? Like seriously? Who does that? 'I have a girl' does not equate 'let me try harder.'

So my interest in this topic has been piqued by an observation I made amongst acquaintances and for the sake of ease of explanation I'll try and create the hypothetical story as simple as possible.

Imagine you're a girl and you have a boyfriend. At the present moment, you're going through relationship problems and get close to an old male friend who's also in a relationship. As time progresses, the both of you become closer however in a platonic sense. The guy then starts to push for something romantic, to which you decline for obvious reasons. And for those who don't deal with the obvious, that is --- he has a gf, and even if he didn't you have your bf that you love, and even if that wasn't the case nobody wants to get with someone that's willing to cheat with them anyways. Right?


Fast forward a few months later... The guy confesses that he was lying about having a gf the entire time and the said girl 'failed his test.' I know you're curious as to what exactly was this test. So was I... so you could imagine the onslaught of curious questions I had in mind to wrap my mind around how exactly one rationalizes this 'test,' i.e., what sort of motives are involved? How does one get oneself into such a situation? How can it be avoided?

Apparently, as the story unfolds, the guy wanted to see whether she was interested in him. If she 'passed the test' her response to his 'Umm... actually, I don't have a gf...' was supposed to go like,'Really? Well... that's even better! ...'cuz even if you did have your girl I love you so much that I was willing to take what I can get and wait for you meanwhile...'


Pardon me? You're joking right? You can't possibly be serious?

There's so many things wrong with that equation. I was literally stuttering when I heard this story. It's so ridiculous it's difficult to take serious. People say this kind of stuff? And by people I mean 'Grown Folks.' I can't even begin to describe the level of dotishness that is.

First of all, you meet someone and they're in a relationship. In my world, if I'm single, you're automatically in the brother/friend zone. You could be Tyson Beckford for all I care... it won't make a difference. I wouldn't think 'Oh, let me try harder..!' What kind of sick, low self-esteem person does that? Perhaps 'sick' is not the right word... To be succinct, what kind of person aspires to be a home wrecker?

Which leads to my next point... My consequent question would be 'Why would you want to be with someone willing to cheat on the person they claim to love... and additionally, be ok with you cheating on the person you're with?' Whatever happened to the 'If they cheat with you, then they'll cheat on you' rule? Who's to say this person won't fall for the next friend in line should you end up in a relationship and end up in some rough waters for a while...? Furthermore, what kind of girl would put herself in said situation? Why would she consent to this?

I can't imagine me and my guy in that situation... and he gets a new girl and I say 'Babe, I know you have a new girl and ting... but I just want you to know I love you and always will... and I'm willing to wait for you...'

Umm.. No. Just no. It just won't happen. That's just setting yourself up for abuse. That's setting yourself up for being a quotable to his friend's when he's talking about all the girls that he no longer wants that are still begging to be with him, have his kids, etc. Bragging rights I believe? I'm tired of hearing guys refer amused to the long list of ex-es that they have that are 'begging to get pregnant for them' and 'regret cheating/breaking up.'

I mean... I'm still baffled... confounded... by the whole story. It's so absurd, it's hilarious.

Meh... what do I know? My logic has failed me to understand this situation. Fortunately, it's not for me to understand henceforth. Best wishes to the parties involved. Thank God it's not my problem.

Folks, there's too many fishes in the sea to be fighting over fish that's been caught. Leave that for the people who like dramatic stories.

Anyways, let me resume typing my summary for class...
Shelli out.