Don't play with it

In a simpler world, things would be so close to perfect that it would be livable happiness. It's a pity this world is drenched in complexities that you just have to accept... because the harder you fight it, the more tangled it becomes.

***

I am so tired, it doesn't even begin to amuse. My thoughts are molesting my mind and I am trying to quiet it up there.. but I'm not being very successful. In fact, my conscious efforts seem to have resulted in a slight headache.

***

In a world full of such complexities, where only discrepancies prevail. I remain thoroughly confounded. My tired feet move forward, where ever forward feels like in this moment, aimlessly one in front of the other.

I left. I returned. I returned with a delusion of peace... opened my eyes and realized that the pools confusion remained as I left it. I rose higher than it... but the waves splash against where I walk trying to stain my clothing into remembering... but I'm too tired.

If I had one wish, it would be to have one answer... just one.

To any of the millions of questions I asked over and over this past year.

I've got answers before... but I've been deceived before... I've deceived before... and who's to say this time it's the truth. Who's to say that this final answer to the final answer to the last different final answer is the real answer.

I guess there's not much I can do. I can't exactly write up a truth spell and cast it on those around me... and I wouldn't dream to go in that direction...

All I can do, is get up. get out. get over it.

Carefully place everything into a mental box, and scribble roughly with a marker the words "past" until maybe in the future... when perhaps I'm more mature... or finally out of the frame so that I could see the picture...

Everything gets answered in time.

***

Wish for something better...
This time it means...
Stop.

Shelli out.

I shall post my Brazil pics and stories later on.. maybe tonight...