Say what you need to say...

By 10:43 PM ,

"Those are the sounds of a woman leaving...

Stronger than the wind in a willow tree...

Those are the sounds of a heart breaking...

You can't hear it....But the noise is killing me...

I can hear it ...And the silence is killing me" ♫ 

♥ damn time stamps on llfe...:(

(Stolen from Sher)
-"The Sound" Alan Jackson

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I swear... the world better prepare... for when I'm a billionaire.

By 12:08 PM
Wuddup Oprah?


Today is a painting day. Or sketching day at the very least. Stay tuned for pics...

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Now that the world isn't ending... It's love that I'm sending to you... But it isn't the love of a hero...That's why I fear it won't do

By 7:34 AM
It's the middle of the week only.... and I'm pondering the weekend. Hmm...

I doubt I'd have anything eventful to write on today... So I'll just make it Postsecret Wednesday... See more on this website.
















And I'm out.
Deuce.

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I think I'm going to be sick... seriously

By 8:09 PM

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Daydreamer.... living in a nightmare

By 11:54 AM , ,
Today was the first time I walked around town during the day in a very long time. I stepped into the Esplanade Mall and had a 'wtf?' moment... well I had several moments like that...

I mean, I know Ritual's had closed down and merged with Mario's or something like that.... But you can imagine my surprise to walk in and see this humongous shoe/clothing store. Subways now has an inside door to get in from inside the mall as opposed to being open out as it was before. Then I saw a few stores I don't really remember seeing before -- expanded to several room spaces. Tourists stores and such. Wow. And then... I realized my friend's mum store was gone... so no more random visits to pester him. Then the bookstore next door was gone too... hmm... It was truly a weird experience. I felt like a tourist.

***

So I'm on the hunt for the perfect noose of responsibility to fit around my neck, also known as 'The Student Loan'. You know, checking for good rates, etc. I don't think anyone understands how reluctant I am about this.... But you gotta do what you gotta do right? It's not like it's a novel idea, and other people have pulled it off. There's no reason this should be a torturous experience that continues long after school has finished. Especially by the looks of it, I'm pushing to get a job... so at least I should be able to cover the interest on my own. Now... for Plan B - prayers that I get the full scholarship....

Three cheers for independence...!

Oooh... currently I'm working part-time at this villa/resort called 'Grooms Beach Villas & Resort.' Now prior to my mom sourcing the job for me, I never really knew the place existed. The first day, I went on a tour and I was in awe. The villas are gorgeous. The prices are pretty decent too... And naturally, I love the pool - it's nothing extravagant, but I just like pools. Click here to go to their website which has pics...I also joked with my boss the first day telling her that this must be Grenada's best kept secret..........only to reach front desk and see that's their tagline on the brochure...!

***

I've been thinking recently... like all of my past experiences and such. And I'm realizing there's a special level of dunceness when it comes to men. I'm not going to say all guys are the same, because like all girls, I'd like believe my man is different and special and if anyone should ask - that's what I would say. "It's true for every other guy - but mine, because he's special, and different, and would never intentionally hurt me like that..etc etc" But it's not to say I wasn't wrong before with previous guys.

And it's not particularly hard to catch them in their lies too...Regardless of how slick they convince themselves they are. All it truly requires is for the girl to not be totally and utterly in love with the guy beyond the point of stupidity and not willing to place total implicit trust in him - which is difficult.... because I'd like to think when girls love they love deep, well at least good sincere girls. Once a girl trusts you... then she's willing to believe anything you say, because it sounds much better than the truth.

I caught a guy by virtue of darling Facebook once. It's amazing the things that can be revealed just by pure observation. It took a long time for me to see what everyone else saw too, and even after I saw with my own eyes, I still found myself wanting to believe him but knowing at that point it was just absurd. And finally having to accept that he never really cared about me, the way he should. My friend caught one of her ex-es by virtue of Hi5, when hi5 was still reigning.

I have lots of guy friends that cheat, and what they bank on is the mere fact of how loyal their girl is. Once that confidence has been established, more so the attachment of the girl not wanting to lose the guy very easily, it's like their playboy ticket becomes released. The elaborate tales I hear make me laugh sometimes, and make me gasp sometimes... and the sad part is, I know I would fall for it. Any girl who loves their guy that much would fall for it - the lies, the scheming, etc. It's not the falling for it that's the problem though... it's the not being able to see the trick because of the tunnel vision blinkers. And the guys know that. If any of those girls were to just have a paranoid moment, and just set their boy up to see how they'd behave. I'm sure they'd be shocked and surprised at what they discover.

Then again, why jeopardize your own happiness? Ignorance is bliss. And not all guys are trifling, deceptive, good-for-nothing, immature, punk-@$$ liars. There are good guys out there that don't cheat. They are good guys out there that care about their girl and think the world of her. There are good, loyal boyfriends out there.... and then there's a few good ones that still young and stupid and would flirt *cough* innocently *cough* with other girls and mean no harm by it, as annoying as it is.

What I find most ironic, and hilarious about the situation though.... is the double standard. As a girlfriend, if you kiss another guy, flirt too much with another guy, etc (different guys have different limits.... but the standard bar is usually comparatively very low compared to the stuff the stunts they pull that is considered acceptable). Should a girl, do any of the things that her boy does that upsets her, ie. avoid admitting that you're in a relationship when talking to a new guy, flirting, dancing vulgar/seductively with another guy, kiss another guy, end up in a compromising situation, OR fail a set up test... like where they send in one of their boys that you don't know or something to see how you'd react.......they more than overdo it with their reaction time. Guys seem to behave like they have their finger on the break up pulse lest something arise. Whereby, girls tend to be more forgiving and (stupidly) softhearted.

This is just an opinion though... my test sample for observation has been a fraction of a fraction of a marginal part of the male population. But I'm yet to find evidence that says differently.

***

What do you think? I'm sure every girl has a loser-ific ex-boyfriend experience... And I'm sure most guys have some experience, whether they got burned or not, with scheming with their past and/or current girlfriends.

Post your comments.

Shelli out.

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Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over

By 5:12 PM , ,


Perfect. Now... I just have to prove it to myself.

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That's ok. I'll just torture myself with all the could-be possibilities happening right now. :(

By 11:00 PM

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How could you tell me to get through it?

By 11:26 PM ,

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...Or I'd fall asleep on his shoulder and fall asleep to his heart beat

By 12:39 PM

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